Hassle
by HaloKeres-Chan
Summary: If there was anything Natsu hated more than Ice Princess and Iron Head, it was hassle. He shouldn't have been surprised that a ditzy blonde was the cause of today's problems. *BASED ON A TRUE STORY*


Hassle

* * *

Natsu Dragneel clapped a hand over his mouth as the train hit another bump on the rails. What he wouldn't give to jump off this train and walk to Fairy Tail.

Fairy Tail was the bar Mirajane, Elfman, and Lisanna-AKA, the Strauss siblings-ran alongside the "Master," or manager, Makarov. It was just Natsu's luck that they decided to have it on the opposite side of town. He always walked to the place-even if it did take three hours.

He would've gladly walked there again, but Erza requested that he pick up Wendy, since her mother, Grandeeney (Natsu still thought it was a weird name for a mom to have) had work at Tartaros she had yet to take care of. Who was he to deny Erza (she would've murdered him. Natsu shivered at the thought)?

At the next stop, Natsu stared longingly at the doors as they opened, allowing passengers to exit and new ones to enter. A girl about his age, with golden hair and chocolate eyes, sat next to him and opened the purse dangling off her shoulder. The doors closed and the train began to move again, leaving Natsu in his pitiful state of wanting to puke.

The blonde pulled out her cell phone and dialed a number. "Hello? Lev? Yeah, I'm heading over there right now!" She buzzed excitedly. Natsu didn't get why. How come she didn't suffer like he did? Why was he even listening to her conversation in the first place? Why did he care?

"Are you sure I'll fit in there? I mean, it'll be my first time..." The blonde trailed off. "What if everyone hates me?'

 _The fudge is she going on about?_ Natsu thought, eyebrows quirked. He ruffled his rosy bangs and stifled a groan as the train sharply veered to the left. The girl's phone flew out of her hand. It hit him smack-dab in the face, with the girl following shortly after. She let out a cry as she fell into him. They both fell out of their seats. People stared.

Natsu blinked his eyes open to find himself on his back, staring at the train's ceiling. The map's light indicated that there were still two more stops until Cait Shelter, where Wendy waited for him. His stomach churned at the movement of the vehicle.

He looked down at his chest when he finally noticed the heavy weight on him. He saw a bush of blonde hair, a small portion of it held up by a dark cobalt hairtiye. He vaguely noticed how red his face had gotten, or how hot he felt.

Natsu Dragneel fell into a nervous wreck at the sight of the blonde girl on top of him.

He never associated with girls in that manner. The closest he'd gotten to romantic gestures with girls was when he and Lisanna were kids and how they raised Happy when the cat had been born. She pretended to be his wife and actually fantasized about getting married. Now that she was sixteen, she'd gotten over that freaky dream, but she still teased him about it nonetheless. In fact, everyone in Fairy Tail teased him about his bashfulness around girls altogether.

"Oh! I'm so sorry!" The blonde hurriedly sat up and crawled off Natsu, clambering into her seat. There was a streak of pink across her face. She'd clearly been embarrassed too.

Natsu nearly hurled as the train bumped again. He pitifully tugged himself into his chair and forced out an "It's okay" as a sign that he'd acknowledged her message. His face went from red to green.

She gazed at him. "Are you motion sick?" She asked.

He shakily nodded.

"Then why're you on the train?"

"A 'friend' asked me to help her out with an errand."

The girl failed to notice his emphasis and sarcastic use of the word "friend."

"Really?" She asked.

Natsu nodded to save himself from vomiting the contents of his breakfast. From the corner of his eye, he noticed a man heading down the train cart. Was he checking tickets? It looked like it. He readied his own ticket.

The girl seemed to have noticed too. She opened her purse and dug through it. One of her eyebrows raised. She started digging a little bit harsher. Natsu noticed her muscles tensing. "That's funny. I could've sworn my ticket was in here..."

 _No ticket?_ Natsu thought. Well, most people forgot, considering it wasn't everyday the ticket checkers came on the train to check the tickets. The Metro wasn't top priority in Magnolia City, after all.

Her face scrunched up in worry. "Oh no, no, no, no...don't tell me I lost it!" She whisper-shouted, gritting her teeth as she searched through the multiple pockets of her skinny jeans. "Now what'll I do...?"

Natsu looked at the spare ticket in his pocket. It was for Wendy, for when she got onto the train with him. He briefly considered handing it to the girl to use and buying Wendy another one, but it was a child ticket, so it wouldn't do much good anyway.

The man came over with one of those scanners to identify an I.D. for fines. He had piercings galore and a couple tattoos along his bare arms. Natsu grumbled in distaste; the man reminded him of a certain Iron Dragon.

He held his hand out in front of Natsu. "Ticket?"

Natsu held it up, showing the stamp and that it was, indeed, an adult ticket. The man wordlessly nodded and turned to the blonde girl. "Ticket. Now." He demanded.

The girl smiled nervously. "Sorry, but, um, I kinda lost it somehow when I got onto the train, and - "

The man cut her off. "I.D., please. You'll have to pay the fine of sixty jewel, unless you want to pull it out of your pocket."

She gaped. "What? But I really did buy a ticket, and-"

"Pay up." He said.

Natsu's eyes narrowed. The last time he was on the Metro, the fine for traveling without a ticket was what, thirty jewel? This guy doubled it. No doubt he was a crook after money to store in his own pocket.

The girl looked into her lap. "I left my I.D. at home..." She trailed off. "I wasn't expecting this..."

It was Natsu's turn to gape. Just what kind of idiot would leave their I.D. at home?

The man groaned. "Look, miss - "

"The name's Lucy." She grumbled, crossing her arms. "I'd prefer if you not call me 'miss.'"

" - you'll just have to pay the fine out of your own pockets, then." The man finished, ignoring her interjection.

The girl - Lucy - turned to Natsu with pleading chocolatey eyes. He swallowed nervously, all awareness of his motion sickness gone. His sweaty palms gripped the edge of his chair. "...what?" He asked finally, hoping his voice hadn't sounded too hoarse.

The man noticed how she looked at him. He turned to Natsu and pointed a ringed finger at Lucy. "You her boyfriend?"

Natsu reddened. "What?! No, I - "

"Yes! Yes he is!" Lucy cut him off.

Natsu stiffened in shock for a moment, before glaring at her. _The fudge are you playing at, Blondie?_

He held his hand out. "If she can't pay up, you'd better have your I.D. on you." The man said.

The sakura-haired boy sighed. "She's not my girlfriend. We're not dating. This is her problem, not mine."

Lucy elbowed him in a playful manner. "Don't lie, um..." She trailed off, a glint in her eye. It made Natsu shiver. _Fine. Be that way._ He thought, crossing his arms.

"Natsu." He whispered.

Lucy smiled. "Right! Don't lie like that, Natsu!"

The man released his own sigh. The train came to its next stop, the doors opening. He headed out. "Come with me." He told the two of them, in a demanding voice.

Lucy grabbed his hand a little too forcefully for his liking and dragged him off the train. He noticed something written on her arm in pen. When did she get the time to write that?

 ** _Play along or you're dead._**

Natsu shivered at the menace behind it. Just who was this woman?

* * *

A loud yawn escaped the pinkette's mouth, earning a punch in the shoulder from Lucy.

Because of their refusal to hand over the jewel required for the fine, the man Natsu was pretty sure was a crook ended up calling the police and had them hauled to the police station. Currently, they sat in one of the offices, Lucy arguing with one of the officers that she did indeed purchase a ticket, and simply lost it somehow. Now he was late in terms of meeting Wendy at Cait Shelter.

He silently slipped his phone out of his pocket and texted Grandeeney as best he could without anyone noticing.

 **Ran in2 a prblm on train. Ill b l8. Srry.** ;(.

 _ **-Natsu**_

After that, he slid his phone back into his pocket wordlessly.

"I told you, I paid for the ticket! You can go ask the cashier that gave it to me!" Lucy grumbled. Natsu rolled his eyes.

"And I told you, miss, we need to see your ticket in order to let you go." The officer repeated.

Lucy huffed. "Do you know who you're talking to?" She made it sound like a threat.

"A ditzy blondie trying to get out of not paying for a train ticket." Natsu deadpanned, voice slightly laced with sarcasm. The glare she gave him rivaled Erza's. He shivered again.

" _No,_ my name is Lucy Heart-fi-li-a." She emphasized the syllables of her last name. "And you, police officer sir, just falsely accused me of a crime."

The officer gaped. "Heartfilia?!"

Natsu blinked. "Is there a problem with her last name?"

Lucy balled her hand into a fist and punched his temple. Hard. "Imbecile! How stupid could a person be to not know anything about the Heartfilia Corporation?!"

"Am I supposed to care?" He drawled.

"Yes!" Lucy threw her arms up, letting herself fall back in her chair. "The Heartfilia family may as well be the richest family here in Magnolia! My dad and I pretty much run the place!"

He didn't look impressed. "So you could arrest me if I didn't do anything wrong?"

"Yes!"

He nodded. "Right. Sure."

The officer visible trembled in his uniform. "F-Forgive me, miss."

Lucy smiled. "All is forgiven if you let us go."

The officer had the door open for them in an instant.

When the duo left the police station, Natsu turned around and flicked Lucy's forehead. "Just why the hell did ya get me caught up in this?!" He shouted in frustration, raking his hands through his spiky salmon hair. "Now I'm late pickin' up Wendy!"

Lucy, holding her forehead tenderly, bowed. "Sorry! I just really needed help in getting out of that mess!" She apologized.

Natsu huffed. "I wasn't even much help in the end. If you needed to get out of it, then why didn't you use your last name in the first place?"

The blonde smiled, though it was hollow. "I don't like using my family name to get out of things. I prefer doing things myself and getting out of it without the help of that bastard of a father. It's a sort of last resort, really." There was a taste of melancholy in her tone. He didn't like it.

She winked. "I had my I.D. the whole time, by the way." She poked her tongue out.

Natsu fumed. "Then why the fudge didn't you show it to him?"

"Because, unlike most people, I actually care about protecting my identity! If that guy was a crook, then - "

"About that, he was a crook. Smelled it on 'im." Natsu pointed out. "If the tattoos didn't give it away, anyways."

Lucy groaned. "Just because I'm blonde doesn't mean I'm stupid!"

"Yeah, it kinda does."

She just placed her phone back in her purse and ignored his comment. "Forget it. See ya, Natsu!" She trotted off somewhere - as to where, Natsu could care less. He just went back onto the train to pick up Wendy. Which would be at least another twenty minutes of hell. Great.

* * *

"Why were you late, Natsu-san?"

Wendy held her kitten-shaped backpack in her lap and stared curiously at him.

Natsu held his breath and thought about Happy ripping his face off for not bringing home fish instead of the fact that he was on a train - his worst enemy in the history of enemies. "Some ditzy blonde." He answered hurriedly.

She perked up. "That reminds me! Levy told me there's gonna be another person joining us at Fairy Tail today!" She rubbed the tattoo on her right arm.

Natsu reached up to grab his own mark, the one that all "members," or employees of the Fairy Tail bar had. While Wendy's was a bright sapphire that matched her hair, Natsu's was a dark crimson. He couldn't help but wonder who the knew Fairy Tail member was. They didn't get new employees very often.

When the two arrived at the bar, Gajeel, Erza, and Gray were engaged in a fist fight. Juvia cheered on her "beloved Gray" while Elfman kept trying to figure out how to get involved in the brawl. Mirajane and Lisanna merely watched from the sidelines behind the bar, both cleaning glasses and alcohol bottles. Natsu folded up his sleeve, ready to join. Wendy stopped him.

Makarov stood on the bar and clapped his hand together loudly. "All right, everyone! I'd like you all to meet our new member, Lucy Heartfilia!"

Natsu stiffened. Did he hear that right? Lucy Heartfilia? Oh, Mavis, no. He could _not_ be serious.

Indeed, it looked like the Master was serious. How else could anyone explain the blonde with the same cedar eyes and blue hair tie?

Natsu pointed at her. "It's you! The ditzy blonde from the train station!"

Lucy gaped and pointed back. "It's you! The sarcastic pink-haired imbecile!"

Levy intervened. "What's this about trains and sarcasm? Luce?"

Natsu's mouth formed an "o". He turned to her. "You know her?"

Lucy puffed her cheeks and nodded. "He wouldn't help me when the crook on the train tried to fine me!"

"That's because you said I was your boyfriend when I wasn't!"

"What's this about you two dating?" Erza stepped in. She turned to Natsu. "Is there something going on here that I don't know about?"

Natsu shivered. "N-No! She just lost her ticket on the train and dragged me with her!"

Lucy nodded. "Yeah! He's right! There's nothing going on between us! I swear!"

Levy smirked. "I still ship you two now, though. What should your name be?"

"LuNa?" Gray suggested, smirking.

Levy poked his cheeks. "No! That would suggest that Lucy's the seme! And put your clothes back on!" She scolded.

"I'm not being the uke!" Natsu shouted over Juvia's seething about Levy being a potential rival. Gray hurriedly searched for his missing shirt and jeans. "And I'm not going to even be part of this either! There is nothing between us! Got it?"

"That's right!" Lucy agreed. "We just met on the train and that's the end of it!"

"NaLu it is!" Levy ignored them, proclaiming their ship name to the world.

Lucy groaned. "How did you even get that from our explanation?"

Natsu just sighed and sat himself down at the bar. Mirajane held her head in her palms, elbows resting on the counter. "Well, you've got to admit it. You two would be adorable together~." She chirped.

He slammed his face down on the table.

* * *

THE END! OH MY MAVIS I'M SO PROUD OF MYSELF FOR FINALLY FINISHING THIS YES.

Hi again, lovelies! Here is Hassle for you! And yes, a similar situation actually happened to me during my vacation.

The crook guy on the Metro checked my ticket and seemed okay with it for a second, but he automatically assumed with how tall I was that I purposefully bought a ticket not for my age! I was seriously hauled off to the police station and the officer wouldn't stop asking me for my I.D. In the end, I gave it to him to verify my age, and he said I was okay, but he still wanted to file a case against the crook who set me up. I told him a stern no and stomped out of the station after that and headed out on my merry way.

Yes. True story. Anyways, Hassle is my newest OneShot told in _Natsu's_ perspective for once! There's no real romance, just friendship and a whole lot of comedy. Arigatou for reading all my stories, lovelies! Fated's next chapter will come out soon! Same with TEIWWB! AND I UPDATE RANDOMLY. IF I DISAPPEAR FOR EIGHT MONTHS AT A TIME DON'T BE SURPRISED.

If there's any mistakes, tell me so I can fix it. Bye, lovelies!

~HeavenDragon


End file.
